Disagreement in a D/s-M Lifestyle
Husband to Dominant
A few weeks ago Little Kaninchen and myself had an D/s-M Lifestyle disagreement so to speak. At least in our vanilla days it would have been an argument. I had said something to her that was condescending and I said it in a condescending manner. I didn’t realize that I was doing so but I was. She finally got disgusted with me and lashed out. My vanilla self would have been up for the fight. I would have jumped right in to prove to her that I was correct. That I was superior… In actuality I would have been fighting for dominance.
Her outburst did in fact upset me. The situation also left me wondering what to do, after all I am the dominant. And as her dominant I am the leader. The one looked upon in times of turmoil to have knowledge and to do the right thing, make the correct decision and to be consistent.
As a dominant I didn’t need to fight for my dominance… Little Kaninchen had given that to me long ago. This left me in a much calmer situation. A situation where I could calmly decide my course of action. Needless to say, we did not fight. No ill words were exchanged. I explained to her that I would require more respect from her than I was currently receiving. She again shot back a vanilla quip trying to provoke me into an argument and once again she received no such response. It was late in the evening when this situation occurred so there wasn’t a lot of time for our frustration to grow. We simply went to bed without discussing it. (A major mistake that any married person can attest to.)
The next morning we both laid in bed in each others arms and discussed what had happened the evening prior.
She curled up in my arms and said that she felt as though we were broken. She couldn’t stand the vanilla way in which I was treating her. She felt as though our D/s relationship was in jeopardy.
I apologized for my condescending behavior toward her the night before. I explained that we were not broken, that I was punishing her for her behavior. In hindsight, I should have made it clear the evening prior, before we went to bed, that I was indeed punishing her and what the punishment was. By not doing so I created a scenario in which she felt that are D/s was broken.
Her punishment was that she did not wear her cuffs to bed the night prior, nor did she ask. And that the next day we would not have sex, even though I just got back in town and our children were in school. And I would not refer to her as Little Kaninchen.
Basically the punishment was a completely vanilla day, 24 hours from the infraction.
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Disagreement in a D/s-M Lifestyle | Husband to Dominant