Another question I need your input on Mr. Fox.

Punishment and Aftercare

We have done the erotic spanking and that type of thing, but the time has come where punishment is in order.  I took over the finances for my submissive because she could not handle them and had herself in a bad situation.  Over the last year I have gotten her back on solid ground and actually ahead, something she has never had, but here in the last couple weeks she has started to regress to her old habits.  I warned her of the impending punishment if things did not change and I now need to follow thru on my word.  The question I have is after the punishment, twelve lashes with my belt, I will put her to bed, no sex, and no pleasing me which will also be a problem for her.  I still need to ensure her it is for her own well-being that she brought me to the punishment.  Do you think aftercare is needed shortly after punishment or wait till the next day?  Your thoughts on the subject will be helpful.

Thanks again for your time
Excellent question…

 

Aftercare should begin immediately after the punishment.  
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The idea of a punishment is to let your submissive know that she has done something that disappointed you.  The punishment is something that is administered because you CARE for them and their well-being.  

Often times the submissive will be surprised and may even be confused as to why they are being punished, even when you have been giving them ample warning that if they do not straighten up a punishment will be in order.

Be sure that prior to administering the punishment that you clearly communicate with your submissive exactly what the infraction was that has warranted a punishment.

Immediately after the punishment hold your submissive in your arms and stroke her hair.  Explain to her how difficult it was for you to punish her but it is something that had to be done.  Assure her that she is a wonderful submissive and that you are confident that she will not make that mistake again  Hold your submissive in your arms for a while where she can feel safe.
Your submissive will feel bad for disappointing you but she will need the reassuring that you still love her and also that your D/s is stronger than ever and not weakened by her infraction.
Best wishes,
Mr Fox
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8 Comments
  1. Sasha Riley 6 years ago

    Happy to introduce myself to you Mr Fox.
    Your information has been very helpful to me.
    I have been a submissive/slave for 2 years to my darling
    and during our time he has had to punish me.
    I believe aftercare should occur the next day in my case my Dom’s feline as he refers me as to lick her wounds but not in sadness but sheer delight.
    Our next time togerher will involve punishment the reason being that I have found another that adores me and his intentions are more then sex. I let my new lovr enjoy his desire for anal which I have not let my Dom enjoy.I told my Dom of the intense yet gentle experience and he replied that my ass will be full of his cock….it will just depend on how I behave wheather HE IS GENTLE OR NOT!!!!!
    SASHA

    • Author

      Welcome aboard Sasha!

      I appreciate your insight. I have not mentioned this in this particular post but obviously my posts are simply my own point of view and dynamic. Everyone’s journey and dynamic is personal and will and should look a little bit different. I enjoy hearing about others and their dynamics. I believe it also beneficial to others to realize that there are several different techniques in D/s and no one technique is correct.

      When I refer to punishment I am referring to something that LK can not take any pleasure in. If you were to ask her about a punishment I am confident that she would tell you that she would never like to receive one again, and she enjoys pain. There is no “sheer delight” in any punishment that LK receives.

      To be truthful these punishments are difficult for most newer loving Dominants to administer, including myself. I am thankful that they are far and few between.

      Im not convinced that you are not looking forward to your punishment with your Sir…

      It sounds like your next reunion will be over the top hot to me!

      Thanks again for sharing your dynamic with me, I look forward to learning more about you.

      Best wishes,

      Mr. Fox

  2. Sasha Riley 6 years ago

    There is a punishment that my darling administers to me when I am bad and I find no pleasure in it at all. He ties me to his bed and he slowly walks around and tells me how he is going to pleasure me touching me as he talks and yet I cannot touch him…such torture!!!!
    Sasha

    • Author

      Sasha,

      Your Dominant sounds very deviant…

      I like this style of punishment…

      I look forward to learning about your next time with your Sir!

      Regards,

      Mr Fox

  3. LK 6 years ago

    Thank you Sir for posting on subject.
    I do feel so bad when I disappoint you.
    It’s great after that you let me know that its over and our D/s is still strong.

    All My Submission,
    LK

    • Author

      My Little Kaninchen,

      You know that all I desire is the best for you LK.

      And the worst punishment of all is the one in which you inflict on yourself by realizing that I am disappointed.

      Punishments prove to be difficult for this loving Dominant. I am thankful that you seldom require punishment.

      Love you madly,

      Mr. Fox

      KTUS 5-Days

  4. CME 6 years ago

    My Dom lives several hours away. So when I misbehave, I have to make a list of my infractions, the reasons the actions (or lack thereof) were naughty and what I should have done instead. I then present the list to Him and he reads it aloud and he asks me questions, if he has any, before my punishment is administered. After my punishment for my misdeeds, I am allowed to tear up the list as a visual symbol of my absolution. Then my infractions are forgiven, forgotten and never mentioned again. I like this,as does my Dom.

    • Author

      CME,

      I really like the idea of tearing up the list of infractions as a visual symbol of absolution.

      What a wonderful idea!

      The dynamic that your Dom and you share sounds like a loving and respectful D/s relationship.

      Best wishes and happy holidays,

      Mr. Fox

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