That is one powerful statement! It is promising because you realize several key factors regarding your D|s-M relationship.
- What you had.
- What you want.
- What you are.
- That her submission is truly a gift.
- And most importantly that you want to earn that gift back.
She may have lost confidence in your ability to lead.
This is classic vanilla… It is common that early in a couple’s journey when partners become frustrated that they revert back to their old habits of being vanilla. These old habits didnt work for you when you were vanilla either that is why you both were so willing to try something different. If we were to break this down to its most basic elements it would be poor communication. When you began feeling that she was beginning to take control back instead of shutting down you should have communicated these feelings to her. I use what I refer to as downtime to communicate with my LK.
After I shut down and stopped doing BDSM and DD all together 3 weeks ago of course started to make her feel neglected, unwanted, and betrayed.
Communication… Right back to vanilla!
Her trust in my leadership is gone. She craves a BDSM relationship and I crave to lead but I’m clueless as to where to go from here.
You need to start from the beginning and create a sound D/s-M foundation…
Lost D/s Dynamic
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