HD003 – 5 Skills That Could Change Your Life, Your Marriage

HUSDOM PODCAST HD003 5 SKILLS TO ENHANCE MARRIAGE

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Description

Gentlemen,  I am excited to announce the weekly publication of the husDOM podcast.  

I was inspired to share some of my thoughts during my drive to the airport.  The idea of sharing these thoughts is not to try and tell you. how you should do something or how you should think but rather to inspire some genuine curiosity and self-evaluation.  

While I was thinking about why I am not striving to be a better man or striving for 110% every day of my life, I thought of 5 skills that are essential in developing a Dominant Leadership attitude.

Show Notes

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Speakers

  • Mr Fox 

Transcript

5 Skills That Could Change Your Life, Your Marriage

SUMMARY KEYWORDS

men, life, confidence, discipline, purpose, work, courage, leader, today, consistency, slip, action, attributes, healthy, struggle, normal routine, drive, consistently, habit, succeed

Mr Fox   01:03

Today as I was driving into the airport, I started thinking about how I’ve let something in my personal life slip, something that’s been very important to me over the years. And I was trying to figure out why.  It’s working out!

Mr Fox   01:18

And sometime after COVID hit, I don’t know what happened. Don’t there’s not a date, just somehow, over time, maybe as the gyms were closing, maybe as the fear of getting COVID from being in a gym, everybody breathing hard. I don’t know what it was. But somewhere it slipped out of my normal routine. I can make up any excuse that I want. The reality is, I have weights in my basement. And when I’m at home, I typically work out at home. Why did I lose the habit? I don’t know. Some people see working out as a negative, they can’t stand it. They hate every minute of it. I’m not that person, I actually enjoy it. I enjoy doing it. I enjoy the feeling that I get afterward. I enjoy the confidence that it gives me, the clarity in my mind, my mindset, the discipline that I have from following that routine and that schedule.  The discipline and how it rolls over to other aspects of my life. I enjoy working out. Why did I stop? 

Mr Fox   02:13

The interesting thing was is as I started thinking about it, I realized that I also I don’t eat healthy anymore. Again, for myself really unusual. I’m that weird guy that likes to eat food that’s good for you. It’s not a challenge for me. I don’t feel like I’m choking it down or anything. I prefer it. I know. That’s crazy. So I start thinking now why am I eating, not so healthy? And I started thinking, well, it takes more effort to go to the store to get perishable food that would be healthy. Right? I got this thing that’s packaged in plastic where I can open it up and eat at any time. It’ll last a week, it’ll last two. But really, at the end of the day, I would prefer to have fresh fruit. So again, why did I let it slip? For myself? I see it as some sort of lack of discipline. Now I have two things. It’s my workout. It’s my diet. So then it strikes me this lack of discipline, this lack of purpose. It’s not compartmentalized to just my workout and just my diet. I’d be lying to myself, if I said it was, right?  These are the two things that I was thinking about it as I was driving into the airport today.  This attitude shift whatever happened, it’s got to be negatively affecting all aspects of my life to some degree, whether I want to admit it or not. It has to.  There’s no question in my mind, that it’s affected my relationship as well. My relationship with lk, my relationship with my children, other people.  Quite honestly, I don’t even need to know why. I don’t even care why. I know that I’m recognizing it today. And I’m going to put things back in order. Start making those changes, so I can start becoming the man that I want to be. So as I think about getting my own life back on track, I began to think about how this relates to probably many men’s struggles. Right? I’m not alone. I’m not having these same struggles by myself. There are probably hundreds 1000s hundreds of 1000s of people that share this with me. Right? So how do we get back to making sustainable changes in our lives? How do we get back to that? How do we get on the course to be the man that we’re supposed to be? These are my thoughts today. I’m just gonna shoot from the hip. I’ve come up with five principles. They’re not the holy grail, right? But it’s gonna change your life to change your relationship. I guarantee it. If we start thinking about life through these five filters, we’re going to make some positive changes in our lives. 

Mr Fox   04:34

Number one is courage. 

Mr Fox   04:36

We need courage in order to take action. Almost everything around us in society has conditioned us to accept mediocrity. We as men, in many ways, are discouraged from making ourselves better and desiring to be a leader. We need to develop the courage to take positive action in our lives and to be proud of that action. Don’t be discouraged by your perception of what others may think.  It takes courage in our society to want to be better. You want to be a better man, a better father, a better husband, a better dominant.  Your success will make others uncomfortable. Press through it.  Don’t allow your life to be mediocre because others don’t have the courage to make their lives better. 

Mr Fox   05:20

Number two, Confidence. 

Mr Fox   05:23

One of the most basic attributes, but quite possibly the most difficult attribute to obtain is a true genuine, authentic confidence. Confidence is developed as we become more proficient in anything that we do. The goal is overall proficiency and growing as a man and growing as the Father, the husband, the dominant the leader. As we hone these skills and become proficient in these skills, we will gain true confidence to provide and overcome and succeed and everything that we do. Oftentimes, we can gain confidence by those that are in our charge, those that we are leading. They’re the ones that have seen our success. They know that we have the ability to succeed.  They’ve been there for us while we’ve done it. This is where your partner, your wife, your submissive can get you up out of that recliner. And you can become the leader that lies within you.  To help find the true potential in your life. This isn’t topping from the bottom. This is how a healthy relationship is supposed to work. We support one another and help each other. Help reach the potential to become the best that we can be. It’s what a marriage is supposed to be. It’s teamwork.

Mr Fox   06:34

Number three, Discipline and Purpose. 

Mr Fox   06:38

Discipline is accomplished only after we have the courage to take action. And we have developed the confidence in our abilities to succeed. We need a purpose in order to find discipline. What’s your purpose? Our purpose will look different for everyone. Are you doing it for yourself? Are you doing it for your wife, are you doing it for your family. It’s been my experience while talking to mentoring coaching many men along their journeys that for whatever reason, men struggle to truly take action for themselves. Maybe it just feels wrong, maybe they feel guilty. With that guilt. They’ve only been half in.  Half in the game for so many years.  Or they haven’t been committed 100% or fully committed to the development of their loved ones, their children, their families, their friends, their wives, their submissives.  Many men need a bigger purpose than themselves to start the process of personal growth. What will be your motivator? What is your drive?  For many men in the beginning their personal growth and development. Their purpose, if you will, is for those around them. For those that are in their charge. The thought of bettering their children or their spouse is often their purpose.  It is more powerful than bettering themselves. Somehow there’s guilt in that, especially in today’s society.  The dominant the leadership, the man the masculinity, somehow those aren’t popular things. 

Mr Fox   08:01

Number four, Consistency. 

Mr Fox   08:04

Once we found the Courage to take action, the Confidence that we can carve our own path that we’re doing the right thing, and we found our Discipline or our Purpose, and why we’re doing this, we now need Consistency to make it effective. All of the prior attributes without consistency aren’t going to make any distinguishable changes in our lives, we can want it, right?  We can have the courage to do it. So we can take action, we can find confidence in doing it. We can even find its purpose. But if we don’t work on this skill consistently, it really isn’t going to change our lives at all. Up until now, we’ve created an intention of change. Now we need to put that intention to work. And with doing so we need to work at it consistently to make any real change in our lives. 

Mr Fox   08:54

Number five is Sustainability. 

Mr Fox   08:57

This is the goal, right? We want to make a sustainable change in our lives. We don’t want to do 75% of the work, and then not have it stick. In order to have sustainability, we need to have done it consistently. That consistency transforms what we once had to work hard to maintain to just being a way of life.  We begin to build a habit. That’s ultimately what we’re going for. So it doesn’t take an effort. It’s not a struggle, it just becomes who we are. So if you are like me today, if you can look at something in your life, and maybe multiple things. I’ve identified two on the drive to work. But with those two, I realized that there’s more work to do like, like instead of growing and being better, I’m shrinking every day as the leader is the man. Right? There’s something that has let down in me where I’m not trying to achieve greatness every day. And I don’t know what it was, but I’m recognizing it today. This is my three steps forward and two steps back. This must be one of those steps back but it ends today with me and I hope that if anybody feels the same way or can recognize something in their lives that I’m recognizing, in my own today that you’ll use some of these five steps to help get you out of the rut. And we can begin developing ourselves into better men and better husbands, better fathers, better leaders, better dominance. That’s what we’re trying to do in life every day. 1% better every day. Join me every week on this podcast, as we work to become better leaders, better dominance, better husbands and better men. 

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Responses

  1. Mr. Fox, several weeks ago in a live chat you mentioned that you were going to be doing this podcast weekly. I was curious about how random thoughts could be effective in a podcast on a site like this. Having listened to the intro podcast and this first one with substance I wanted to commend you on the concept. As a leader in my industry everything you discussed are things I communicate daily with my team. But I realized that in my personal life although I use these principles I have not done any self analysis recently. If your intent was just to get thoughts moving you succeeded with me. The principles you spoke about are solid. The last two consistency and sustainability are often the hardest. Thank you for getting me thinking today. Have an amazing day!

    1. MasterGardener,

      Thank you for you comments and feedback. I don’t think that there is much that will be said that we don’t already know. But I do believe that for myself, I need reminders along the way. Just a quick reframing of how I am living my life currently and how I want to live my life. The two are almost always in tune but every now and then I see where I am not performing to my fullest potential or not being the man that I want to be.

      Best wishes

      Mr Fox

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