Physical Domination | Badges of Honor | husDOM.com

Physical Domination | Badges of Honor | husDOM.com

Physical Domination

Badges of Honor

“He’s made a few meager attempts to spank me… never very hard, never painful, never truly dominant.”

“I’m not sure how to help him past the “I don’t want to hurt you” mindset.”

“he doesn’t want to hurt anyone” ~ Anonymous submissive

It is a formidable thought for a vanilla husband to envision himself physically dominating his wife. My LK is the most precious person in my life, I absolutely adore her. To contemplate hurting her or causing her any physical or emotional pain would be unimaginable.

Physical Domination

To Physically Dominate your submissive does not mean abusing her by far…it doesn’t mean hurting her at all… Think about what does this mean to you…… Ask her what does that mean to her. Discuss what you dominating her means to both of you.

Physical Domination | Badges of Honor | husDOM.com

My first couple attempts at spanking LK were most         likely,

“never very hard, never painful, never truly dominant”

After administering a spanking Little Kaninchen would reassure me by telling me things such as…

How great it felt to get spanked.

How a aroused she was receiving her spanking.

How she could “take so much more”.

My LK’s skin has always bruised very easily in the past. The first real spanking that I administered to her bottom left some light bruising under the surface of her skin. When I saw it for the first time I nearly felt sick to my stomach. Sick that I could have caused such trauma to this woman that I adore so much. She was standing in front of our dressing mirror examining her bottom. I urgently wanted to apologize to her. To let her know that I would never do anything like that to her again. To assure her that I was not a monster.

Badge of Honor

As my eyes lifted from her bruised bottom to her face I couldn’t believe what I saw; Little Kaninchen’s face was beaming with pride. She loved the marks on her bottom. She called the small marks her “Badges of Honor”. With the war I just battled within me, that comment fit so perfectly.

There is an entire science behind why the pain is transformed into pleasure and that’s not what this particular post is about. It is most intimidating to consider causing this precious woman any harm. As a husDOM™ you need to realize that you are not hurting her. She is submitting to you and letting go and flying free. If you do hurt her you will know it immediately. You wouldn’t need to ask. Her reaction won’t be a whimper, a moan or a grimace, she will be in pain, real pain. Pain like shutting her hand in a door kind of pain. Anything short of that rely on your simple safe words and trust her to communicate if she is no longer enjoying the scene.  You have created a system, trust the system that you created.

HusDom, Mr. Fox

 

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What happened next is what really turns me on during scenes like this.  Lk’s body is subconsciously trying to withdraw from the punishment but somewhere in the depths of her being there is another notion.  The notion to push her shoulders back which will effectively drive her breasts directly into the teeth of the leather falls as they continue to thrust relentlessly on her.

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Responses

  1. Question from a beginner. Should spankings always be associated to punishment of some sort?

    1. Just Me,

      A D/s relationship, much like a regular or vanilla relationship, is individual in nature. What one couple practices may not work well for another.

      I can only speak from my personal perspective and what I have found to work in my relationship with my LK.

      Spankings are incorporated into our sexual encounters almost, if not, always. I have grown quite fond of giving my LK a spanking and the pink glow left on her bottom when I have finished. LK is equally, well honestly probably more fond of receiving a spanking than I am of giving her one.

      There are several different types and styles of spankings.

      For LK and I, spankings are most pleasurable, and on the other hand some spankings are not meant for pleasure.

      As for punishment spanking I should write a post. This subject has proved a bit more challenging for me as a beginner.

      Best wishes,

      Mr. Fox

  2. This mental barrier for me is difficult to overcome. When I finally gave in to her desire to be whipped she enjoyed it, but said I hadn’t gone far enough. It took a week for the bruises to fade and it has been difficult for me to re-engage on this front. She continues to ask and I want to provide for her, I just have to master my own internal voice and be reassured that I am not hurting her.

    The Hunter

  3. This was one of the first hurdles I had to overcome on my journey with my JR. Much like LK my JR really,really enjoys spankings.I had to adjust my mindset and open up my thought process to fully understand the pleasure I was giving her. The most important aspect I have come to realize is the symbiosis of gratitude between the Dominant and submissive.

  4. Oh wow… its like you are in my head…those inner battles kept me from LISTENING to what my wife wanted… even on the vanilla side (would not want to go to the twist side much less this deep cause I could not see it from her perspective that it allows her a release… a way of really getting into things. thanks again for hleping me along the journey.