The Blindfold | The Novice Dom’s Essential Tool

The Blindfold ~

The Novice Dom’s Essential Tool

Beginning a scene, especially as a new husDOM™, can prove to be quite daunting.

The Dominant is looking at his submissive ready to take control of her.  He has given this moment a lot of serious consideration and in his mind he has composed a magnificent scene to be acted out by the two of them with him as the director and her as his pupil.  Her eyes are cast toward the floor out of respect, his own voice sounds foreign to him as he speaks his commands, he is not quite as confident as he thought that he once was.  He can hear in his own voice, the tone of uncertainty, she must recognize it as well.  If she looks at his face she is unquestionably going to recognize his anxiety.  His distress continues to breach his self confidence..

She is patiently waiting as he has instructed her to do…  The Dom that he was just moments before he began is rapidly slipping away, diminishing by the second… The Blindfold | The Novice Dom's Essential Tool

Placed on the leather ottoman beside his submissive is a tray with a few instruments displayed neatly on it.  With sweat beginning to develop on his brow, he reaches down and selects the black leather blindfold.  As she sits on the ottoman, he slowly walks around her until he is facing her, her eyes still cast downward.

“Close your eyes”  he instructs.

He reaches out and runs his fingers through her beautiful long blond hair, his fingers pressing hard on her scalp almost pulling her hair as he slides his fingers from the front of her head all of the way over the top and down her neck.

“Good girl,” he says softly.

He leans in toward her and draws a deep breath through his nostrils,

“I love the way you smell,” he whispers.

Releasing her hair, he causes her chin to drop forward as she was pulling against the resistance of his hand.

He slowly maneuvers the blindfold over her head and covers her eyes.  He can tell by the sharpness of her breath that she is a little startled.

“Breathe,” he says and she begins to calm.

He reaches up and gently takes her chin in his hand and passionately kisses her mouth.  For an instant she doesn’t react.  As her mind begins to measure what is happening to her she reciprocates and begins to kiss him back with voracity.  He pulls away without so much as a whisper.

He steps back quietly and begins to examine her.  She sits perfectly still, she is his submissive.  She derives her pleasure from pleasing him.  Her breathing is deep and purposeful, her mouth is still hung open from the kiss.  She is not afraid.  He reaches out with his index finger and slowly traces across her back from the tip of one shoulder to the other.  He can tell by her expression and her rhythmic breathing that she is enjoying this.

“Now place your hands behind your back for me,” he commands.

She does so without hesitation.

My lk loves to be blindfolded.  The blindfold takes away one of her five senses, sight.  The elimination of one of her senses will heighten or enhance her remaining four senses which can, or in Little Kaninchen’s case, it will be quite arousing.

For a new husDOM™ the blindfold will have a profound effect on him as well.

It will give him a feeling of anonymity.

The blindfold will allow him the opportunity to see her without giving her the opportunity to see him.  He can now step back and look at her, study her without her knowing what he is doing.  He can study her breathing, her expressions, her subtle noises.  After all of those years with my lk I didn’t really know her at all, not like this.  After doing this just a few times I knew her much more intimately, more deeply than all of our years together prior.  It is amazing how much you can learn by watching and paying attention to someone.

The blindfold allows you to lower your guard.

You had the scene planned so well in your mind but it seldom goes exactly as planned.  As you will most likely flounder a bit in the beginning, your submissive will be completely unaware of your difficulties, she is unable to see you.  She won’t be able to tell if you have a worried look on your face or a look of fascination or of complete admiration.  For example, you have already started your scene only to realize that you left your nipple clamps in the toy box in your bedroom closet.

Without her sight inhibited she would see you walk over to the closet and know exactly what you were doing and realize that it was a faux pas.  With her senses degraded she will only be able to hear you move around without knowing what you are actually doing.  Her anticipation will begin to grow rapidly as she waits for your next command.  Her adrenaline will increase along with her heart rate. She will become more aroused as she waits with anticipation.

All of this from a simple blindfold…

I recommend introducing only one new item into your repertoire at a time.  If all goes well during this scene consider adding some music during the next scene.  The blindfold inhibits one of her senses while the music will degrade one of her remaining four senses.  Your choice and volume of the music will also add to the ambience.

The Blindfold | The Novice Dom’s Essential Tool

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  1. This post struck a cord with me, as my wife and I just had our first scene (our first scene together and first time as dom/sub ever). You described pretty closely how I felt. I had everything planned out. I sent my wife an email days in advanced with detailed instructions per advise in one of your previous posts, which she followed to the letter. I did use the blindfold and it did really help! Your posts have been helpful to me in planning and getting in the right head space.

    I see some of the things you have been talking about coming to be. We really opened up about our fantasies and what turn us on, and have felt closer since our first scene. We also don’t remember ever having a sex session that lasted two hours. Just wanted to share and say thanks for this blog.

  2. JohnT,

    Thank you for the accolades! And congratulations…

    It is an honor to hear that my experiences are helping others. At the beginning of my journey, before I set out on my way, it appeared as if it would be an easy voyage. There were several duanting obstacles along the way and I want to help others navigate their way past them. Once you get through it a few times getting in “your right headspace” becomes totally natural, effortless.

    If you have any questions please don’t hesitate to ask.

    If you have something that you would like me to blog about, or similar experiences or even contrary experiences, again please ask.

    I have recently had renewed interest from readers regarding me posting a letter that I had written to my LK prior to a scene. I view these letters as intimate. (Like I don’t post anything about us that is intimate already). I am curious, would reading an actual written letter have proved helpful to you?


    1. Thanks for the reply! I did feel my confidence increase as we went through the scene, so I do think that will continue with subsequent scenes. My wife asked me when we could do it again right after, so I’m sure it will not long until our next one. The rocky spots for me was the planning and writing the note, so seeing an example would provide some inspiration. My letter was more of a note with just instructions on how she should be presented and how the room should be set up. Also was curious as to how detailed the planning should be, just a general idea of what things you want to try or do you come up with a very detailed itinerary?

  3. JohnT,

    I would say that my letter may be regarded more as a note as well. The letter is mostly about her preparing for our rendeveuz. Sometimes I even choose items that I know she does not possess in order for here to make a special trip in preparation. An example would be a particular pair of panties, a paticular wine, or a specific color of fingernail polish (could be color and brand – she will know that you have been thinking of her when the two of you are not together.). These items would be easy to pick up if she were already out and not cost very much to obtain.

    For us it is a part of the build.

    The letters usually do not tell her what I plan on doing during the scene, though sometimes that is hot.

    I am still considering posting one of my letters to LK. The letters should be personal in nature and express your own feelings. As you said, seeing mine should only be for inspiration.

    Thank you for your input.


  4. Blindfolds are good in the ways you describe….but do be aware how seeing things allows the sub to prepare for a blow….I can take a major beating provided I can see the punch coming…but for emotional prep, brilliant.

    I am not sure if I have the right to comment here,…do tell me if you do not want me to speak….as I say, I love you two…so beautiful!

    1. Writing The Body,

      Great feedback, thanks for sharing.

      ‘Having the right to comment’, by all means please do. I am looking for other people’s perspectives here. I want to learn and grow myself.

      Thanks sharing and following…


  5. I’ve used the blindfold for dramatic effect. I recently used candles and had her eyes uncovered at first. She watched the flaming tip of the candle intently, and there was the anticipation of watching when and where the hot wax would fall on her skin. After a few minutes of this I added the blindfold and sensed her tension spike. Now she had no idea of the arrival of the next hot drop of wax. Feedback afterward confirmed it had the desired effect. We aren’t long into this journey, but the renewal it has brought into our relationship after 32 years of marriage is spectacular.

    1. Jimd59,

      Thanks for sharing your experience and how you utilized the blindfold with a candle scene. I am confident that many others will read this and obtain some wonderful ideas.

      Best wishes

      Mr Fox

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