I’m pretty new to this. I’m not really sure what to say, so I figured I would just start talking….
I brought the idea of this type of life to to my wife of 18 years about three weeks ago. She thought about it and said she was game in the bedroom. After a few days of bedroom only, reading Mr. Fox’s posts and chatting with him, I realized that this needed to be 24/7 to work.
I had a talk with my wife and she said that I had been changing for the better already and she submitted to me cause she now trusted me.
Since then she took to subMrs’ site and has been sucked in. Even though I brought it to her, she is getting me to be more comfortable, confident and in control while embrace this way of life.
So right now I figure I’m working on the basics and trying to find that comfortable way to be a gentleman and Dominate in our vanilla life (not just domineering). We both think it’s going well, but this truly has me pushing myself hard to be better. To me, it is so funny how Dominating a woman whom I’ve cherished in a vanilla way has brought us closer and makes me a better person, because even just a year ago I would never had considered this way of life. I love it now, as does my sub. We’re not going back.
Completely understand what you are experiencing Mr. X. I was brought up with the concept of the husband leading the family, but with the practical example being more of a “happy wife, happy life”. So when it came to my marriage with my minx, I gave her every choice I could and went with her preference wherever possible. This left her exhausted as she craved to be led and has discovered through this process that making constant decisions exhausts her.
The other thing my approach did was while I thought I was loving, I was actually stepping back and putting the weight of our life on her shoulders. Since we started D/s she has begun to thrive and even take risks in day to day life that always scared her before. For us, there is no going back and there would be much frustration and disappointment for both of us if we did.
Thanks Sir OTW, it’s nice to know others have dealt with the same thing. I will definitely say this though, we are talking a lot more than we have in the past. Some of the conversations are hard to have for us, but we get through them now and I’m listening while she truly submits and lets me make the decision. You said it best, “happy wife, happy life”… that is still a little voice in my head. One I’m trying to gag, tie up and throw in the closet… 🤔 wait, I have an idea for a new scene…. 😂
That was a great introduction. I really do enjoy learning about other couples and listening to their stories. What their life has been like and how married dominance and submission has changed their relationship.
Your statement, ‘We’re not going back.’ Many if us can relate to that revelation. It is a lot of hard work but the work is all about making us better people, a better couple.