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Newest Member
Hello everyone. As the welcome page said, I do feel quite unsure of what to communicate…but here goes.
I am brand new to the community. My wife and I have been married for 14 years and have somewhere between vanilla and adventurous sex life (all private, but lots of restraints & role play). After lots of research, we’ve been and continue to discuss a Ds relationship. It kind of feels natural for how we are with each other in bed. She’s filling out a questionnaire and we’ll be doing our first scene in a few weeks. I’m unbelievably excited to share this with her.
I’ve been doing a lot of reading on this site and can’t wait to communicate thoughts/ideas/concerns/etc with each of you. I want to do this right!
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1 Reply
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Welcome to HusDOM!!!
Now first things first. The only right way is the way that works for you. It took me too damn long to figure that one out. There is no step by step guide one must follow outside of some very basic concepts Mr Fox outlines in his blogs.
Open honest communication between the two of you is the finest place to start IMHO. Questionnaires for each of you to fill out I am guessing can be a fun place to start when it comes to your shared kink. My sub and I live by the adage , never say never. But there are some hard limits we established early on.
But some in depth conversation about wants needs desires wishes seemed to be the door we walked through early on. After many years of marriage, we were emotionally bankrupt and our communication was nothing more than a negotiation among enemies that barely tolerated the air each other exhaled. Yes, we were extremely bad off. I pray no one else that stumbles across this site is ever in the same boat.
But long term marriages seem to suffer from communication issues in general.
I can say this with certainty. Every major ebb that curvy and I have experienced since we started this D/s has been directly related to piss poor communication leading to unfulfilled expectations.
The kink is amazing no doubt. Getting as close to 100% in tune with your submrs is the real payoff.
Speaking of which, I highly encourage you to introduce her to submrs.com if she’s not already found it. Great companion site for HusDOM.
Again, welcome.
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