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New here – where to start?
Hi. Let me start by saying I am already grateful that this community exists. Thank you.
My wife and I have been together for nearly 15 years–married half that time, with two young kids.
She has always looked to me to be a strong leader, to make the decisions, to fix the problems, to lead our family, and I’m ashamed to say that for the better part of our relationship I have not been that person for her. I’m well on my way to being the man that she needs and deserves–I’ve come a long way–but I still need a lot of work.
We have never had a direct conversation about the D/s lifestyle. In fact, to be brutally honest, I don’t even think I have a solid understanding of what happily married D/s lifestyle looks like. I understand it logically, and know that some choose to practice inside the bedroom only, and some establish it as a natural part of every day life, but I am lacking true awareness of what this lifestyle could offer me, her, and our relationship together. And I am even unclear on what my motivations are, but I do know that they are not purely sexual.
But I don’t know where to start. I clicked on the “where to begin” links up top but best I can tell it’s for the paid accounts only and honestly I don’t know if it makes sense for me to make the investment yet.
What are some good books that can act as an introductory course for a married man wondering if the lifestlye is right for him and his wife? Where can I read some personal accounts of men in my situation? Where can I learn the baby steps necessary to begin to open this dynamic up in my relationship? What is something we can read together to understand if this is something that would help our relationship?
Thank you for your time.
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2 Replies
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Hi curiouslystrong,
Welcome to the group! My wife and I are in a very similar position to you in terms of where we are on the D/s journey. I did upgrade to the premium membership level and have to say that reading through the archive of blog posts has been particularly useful, however there is probably a lot of benefit you can still get from other areas included in basic membership, particularly if you read back through the older content. I’ve found that reading new Dominant introductions like yours and the replies they’ve received are helpful too.
they are good, but the reviews seem to indicate they might be but I haven’t bought either yet.
My thoughts are that anything I read will probably provide inspiration only, not treating anything like an instruction manual as I’m rapidly learning that probably no two D/s relationships are the same!
Have any members got any other ideas they could share?
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curiously strong,
Welcome aboard,
I believe that 95% or more of the ‘Where to Begin’ blog posts are available to the Basic Membership account level. Which means that they are completely Free. Only the past several blog posts are Premium Content. I suggest reading the blogs here and participating on the chat where you can talk with others that have similar experiences as yourself.
Best wishes,
Mr Fox
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