-
Hello from Peter
Hello, all,
My Sub/Wife, Gina, and I have been together for more than 12 years (married more than 10). We’ve always had a fantastic vanilla sex life. Gina has always enjoyed things like anal and being “choked” (mostly just the feeling of a hand on her throat).
Throughout our relationship it has almost always had to be me that intiated sex. A few years ago, I developed an internet porn addiction that lasted until late last year. During that time, we started having problems like loss of intimacy and a severe slow down in our sex life and a break down in our communication. I also became moody and had anger issues. After realizing that the porn was to blame, I gave it up and I am doing well in my recovery.
A few months later we started counseling for our communication issues. While it is not perfect yet, we are making progress.
At Gina’s prompting I started to write about some of my sexual fantasies and we discovered that I enjoyed, and am not bad at, writing erotic fiction. It definitely added some spice to our sex life.
Last month, Gina had to travel for work and to see family. She was gone for 2 weeks. During that time, I wrote several pieces for her to read while she was away. The affect was unexpectedly amazing. The writing was getting her so turned on, that at one point she jokingly asked if she was allowed to pick up a random stranger at her next stop. Before I realized what I was really doing, I said yes, as long she took video for me. It was then that I realized that I really did want that…not a cuckolding/humiliation fantasy, but because I realized that through my writing, I had taken control of her, and also that I found it a huge turn-on to have her have sex with another man for my pleasure.
That scene wasn’t that great for Gina for a variety of reasons. But she definitely liked the concept and she told me she wants to do it again sometime under better circumstances. It was then that we really started talking about our unconventional sexual fantasies. We even joked about changing our careers to accomodate our newly discovered sexual desires. Then we eventually came around to Domination and submission.
We had tried to read FSOG together, but we both had trouble with the poor writing quality and couldn’t get past the 3rd chapter. Then, especially when the movie was coming out, we read a lot about how the book/movie totally misrepresented BDSM. We’ve always been very sex-positive, and FSOG actually indirectly influenced our eventual interest in D/s.
At the same time, we decided that we wanted to start a blog about our experiences making our marriage more exciting and also to publish our erotica. It is under construction and out of respect I will not link it here. We also are getting involved in the erotic social media scene. I discovered HusDom via Twitter.
As far as D/s, we are just getting started. We are each exploring our respective roles. I am reading John & Libby Warren’s book, The Loving Dominant. We have tried a couple of simple scenes. One that we liked involved restraining and blindfolding Gina, while I read one of Anne Rice’s Sleeping Beauty books to her before playing with her. I’m interested in trying a variety of things, including bondage, whipping, mild pain. Gina has said that except for a very few hard limits she is willing to let me try anything. We are looking forward to exploring this together, discovering what we each like, and deepening our relationship.
Similar to what a lot of folks have said about their subs, outside the bedroom, Gina is a competent, intelligent woman, who is in charge of the organization where she works. She has a lot of responsibilities and has to make a lot of decisions every day. She is the mother of a grown child from a previous marriage as well as our own child. But she wants me to be more present in our marriage. To take charge and assume a more dominant role. She wants to be taken care of. I have started taking this seriously and I am seeing how it is going to make me a better father as well as a better lover.
I’m looking forward to learning from all of you.
Explicitly yours,
Peter -
2 Replies
-
Peter,
I too have experienced the way my writing affects my kinkysweetness (KS). We actually met on an erotic literature site. Have you “published” any of your work on a site? If so, I would greatly enjoy reading them. KS and I have only recently started a D/s relationship. Welcome to a new experience and what I feel is a much deeper and stronger bond than ever.
Athanos
-
Hi, Athanos,
Gina and I are in the process of putting our website together. I will be publishing there. Once it is up and running, I’d be happy to send you a private message with the link.
Thanks for the welcome!
Peter
-
Log in to reply.