Exciting Beginning

Dominant Introductions

Exciting Beginning

Posted by mr-sh on at

I will try to keep this brief as an intro. However, the decision to transition to a D/s-M lifestyle, while still in its infancy, has created quite a shift and surprising reaction for myself, and I sometimes get long winded when I get excited.

My wife and I have been married for 4.5 years. The longer story is that we have been romantic for over 11 years and have known each other for over 21 years. In short, I am one of the fortunate ones that married my best friend. I am 37, she is 38. We have a 3 year old son together, and I have a 16 year old daughter from a previous relationship, that I have always had custody of. We have a pretty “good” marriage, and a very “good” sex life. I guess you could say we have a solid vanilla relationship. We have always been adventurous in the bedroom and not much is off limits. This includes some anal play and basic toys (dildos and vibrators). I thought I had it made.

Not long ago, we seemingly lost our edge. It’s been a bit bumpy. Not enough for us to turn away, but something definitely needed to change. We tried different things, but nothing really seemed to make a difference. She recently got a job after being a stay-at-home for the last 2.5 years. Another thing we thought might help. Last week she had to attend some training out of town for a few days and it left us both with some time to think. Friday came and we had plans for an adult only evening for a friend’s birthday. I had my “talk” all planned out. I was going to explain that she had not been treating me the way she should. She had not been respecting me as her husband. That she got away from our “old school” marriage philosophy of honoring her husband. But that I too was responsible, for not being the man she needed me to be to help her get to that place. HOWEVER, before I could begin, she started to explain her discovery during her time away. After some random searches on what she could do to help repair our relationship, she discovered she wanted to be a sub! Admittedly some of her interest was sparked by 50 Shades… I knew that movie was good for something.

I’ve already let this get lengthy, so I won’t bother with details, but we realized we both were thinking the same way. Although her way was much better defined and way more fun! Sex that night was amazing… still vanilla, but incredible. And so begins our journey. We are both the type to not half-ass anything (for better or worse), but realized 24/7 is what seemed to make sense for us. I have poured over this site (which is PERFECT for us as we are 100% committed to our monogamy) and others, but realize we still have a LOT to learn. But, the shift we’ve noticed has been nothing short of unbelievable, already. We are trying to figure out how to navigate this territory with both a young child and an aware adolescent in the house.

I’ll close with some of my more surprising revelations.
I thought I would be turned on by being able to give her orders, but what I found the most stimulating was her obedience. Just her simple “yes sir” responses, even outside of the bedroom, are extremely arousing.
It has made me more aware of my behavior in ALL situations. Through my research, I am learning the responsibility of a Dom, and I’m trying to tailor my conduct and demeanor as such. It is helping me become a better man even out of my D/s relationship.
It’s coming way more natural than I anticipated. I was worried about sounding foolish or being demeaned by her responses. That has not yet been an issue and I feel very much at home here. The feeling seems to be shared by my sub.

I know this has been way too long as an introduction, but from what I gather from this community so far, no one else will better understand my excitement than this group.

I welcome your feedback, suggestions, recommended resources, and any other input you think may help some newcomers.

husdom replied 5 years, 11 months ago 6 Members · 9 Replies
9 Replies

OTW-AMB

Member
at

Welcome Mr. SH, many of your discoveries sound like mine the first few weeks. We are only a couple months in and still learning, and plan to continue the rest of our lives. Respect is a major driver on both sides of our relationship as well.
- mr-sh
  
  Member
  at
  
  Thanks for the welcome!
mr-cain-amb

Member
at

Mr.SH

Welcome to the neighborhood!

I have been a member here for over 3 years so that makes me just like you and OTW. Still learning and at the beginning of our journey. Also I agree with you monogamy is the only path for my V and I. MY advise to you is read all you can on here. Get involved in chat and the forums. Don’t be afraid to jump in and ask questions. I think you will find getting active in this community will help with your mindset. There are a lot of great Doms here and we are all looking to learn. I would also suggest you encourage your wife to be active on our sister site for just subs subMrs. There she will be in a safe environment with like minded subs. I look forward to getting to know you and hearing more about your journey.

See you on chat!
Mr.Cain
- mr-sh
  
  Member
  at
  
  Thanks. She has joined subMrs, and I gather from some of actions that she is picking up some advice.
  I was hoping to join the new member chat this weekend, but have a prior commitment.
  I will certainly be around though.
  - mr-cain-amb
    
    Member
    at
    
    Mr.SH
    
    I am glad to hear she is enjoying subMrs. T o bad you won’t be able to join us for the chat but don’t worry we have a new member chat every month and other chats as well. Hope to see you there soon.
    
    Mr.Cain
buck-amb

Member
at

Welcome Mr.SH

I’ve been a member for around 5 years and believe me I’m still learning things. There is so munch information to be had on the site and on the chat.
Build a strong firm foundation as you are starting and enjoy the journey.

Looking forward to seeing you on the chats. Please check the calendar, there are some chats listed. Some are premium chats and some are open chats. You can just chat with audio if you don’t want to be on with the camera.

Again welcome to husDom and enjoy your journey

Buck
- mr-sh
  
  Member
  at
  
  Thank you Buck. Definitely looking forward to joining one of the chats. I feel like I have a million questions.
still

Member
at

Welcome Mr.SH hope you and your sub are doing well. I am bit late to the welcomes but if you see me in chat say hi I am also learning and new to this dynamic.

Still
husdom

Administrator
at

Mr.SH,

Welcome aboard,

“I thought I would be turned on by being able to give her orders, but what I found the most stimulating was her obedience. Just her simple “yes sir” responses, even outside of the bedroom, are extremely arousing.
It has made me more aware of my behavior in ALL situations. Through my research, I am learning the responsibility of a Dom, and I’m trying to tailor my conduct and demeanor as such. It is helping me become a better man even out of my D/s relationship.”

What a great observation… One worth repeating…

I couldn’t agree more with how being a Dominant has helped me be a better man… I just havent found the words to say it so eloquently as you….

I look forward to chatting with you soon.

Best wishes

Mr Fox

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Exciting Beginning