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Building the structure on the original foundation
I’m a 47 year old remodeling contractor, preacher and Insatiabelle enthusiast. My subMrs and I have been married for 25 years and we have 3 children and 3 grandchildren.
Our dynamic is new and not so new. When W/e got married we naturally operated in a D/s type dynamic based upon our personalities without having the structure. Without the structure it wasn’t truly a D/s dynamic but I’m hoping that you can understand what I’m trying to say.
It wasn’t until recently, within the last 5 years, that W/e started pursuing a true D/s dynamic; i.e. a contract, rules, expectations, rewards, punishments, etc. W/e have always been kinky and had certain interests but W/e were definitely limited based upon her abuse as a child and my in-the-box mentality based upon religious legalism.
After a few years of searching and a partial separation, W/e re-evaluated what is that W/e both wanted and needed which has led U/s back to this point in our lives. Our marriage is better now than it has been in years yet there is still something missing with our dynamic which has led me to search some more and seek out support and advise.
W/e are both on Fet-life and w/e are barely a part of the local kink community but wanting to get more involved. I was encouraged by another member to become a part of this site and so far I am very glad that I have. This is a large part of what I’ve been looking for and I am hopeful that I will benefit greatly as a new Dominant by being able to talk to others that are in similar situations separate from the social media portrayal of what BDSM is all about.
I look forward to engaging with you and reading your experiences and wisdom with the hopes that I can offer you something of my own experiences that will benefit you in return.
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3 Replies
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SYLS-Sir,
Welcome aboard,
Your introduction is great! I feel as though I know who you are after reading the first two sentences.
You mention that your dynamic was similar to a D/s dynamic without the structure. I understand this completely. Many of us naturally posses the personality traits of a D/s-M dynamic but without the structure we just haven’t found much success at the natural order of things in our relationship. Imagine if society would have openly discussed this type of thing when we were all younger.
” I am hopeful that I will benefit greatly as a new Dominant by being able to talk to others that are in similar situations separate from the social media portrayal of what BDSM is all about.”
You have described our community is a nutshell… And the learning continues in the same manner for all of us. I will be the first to say that I am always the student. And it is often the newer Dominants that are looking outside the box and challenging the norm, this is where much of my personal growth continues. With this being said I am looking forward to chatting with you soon.
Best wishes,
Mr Fox
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Just poking up to say that this is a personal friend of mine and he is a great man. Glad to see you here!
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Welcome to husDOM SYLS-Sir
Like you many of us were already in a D/s type relationship but didn’t have the structure or the words dominate or submissive.
It sounds like you have already made great strides in your journey and are on your way. As Mr. Fox has stated we are always learning and growing. I’m looking forward to chatting with you and also learning from you as you learn from us.
Enjoy the journey
Buck
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