- November 24, 2016 at 10:36 am #16071Skipper_TParticipantBasic | Dominant
A while ago I bought nipple clamps (tweezers type with a chain between them) for my wife. At first she refused to wear them as a hard limit, but her position has softened a bit. Last week she almost wore them, but expressed to me that her reluctance isn’t about the physical discomfort they might give but rather that she just doesn’t think of herself as the kind of girl who wears nipple clamps. This is a really interesting psychological block, because it suggests a conflict between her self image and the bedroom submissive I know her to be. A similar thing happened yesterday, she was about to go down on me and I was praising her blow job skills as part of the foreplay (she really has gotten pretty good). She had a hard time taking the compliment. She doesn’t like to think of herself as a giver-of-blow-jobs. So perhaps she needs to flesh-out her self-image as a lover beyond what praise and affirmation can do. Perhaps she is lacking appropriate submissive roll models. Are there other ways to help her build up a good self-image?
Anyway, back to the clamps. I’m wondering what your experiences have been like integrating clamps into play. How did you introduce it? How was it received?
- November 26, 2016 at 9:28 am #16078PeterUnwilligParticipantBasic | Dominant
perhaps you want to try to not to classify her as a “giver-of-blow-jobs” but Your “giver-of-pleasure”. In society a woman who would state she likes to give a blowjobs to a men would seen as “dirty” and “naugthy”. Most women seem not to like the idea to be classified as such. This might have influenced her whole life. Of course she has some troubles to get over it. Perhaps you might talk to her again and make sure that you seperate between public and private and that you like to tell her that she serves you well and that this mean that you respect her more not less in contrast to society.
About nipple clamps. I started with nipple play first. Kissing, caressing, soft bites etc. Its the same as spanking. Start slow and increase intensity. When she is warmed up, perhaps you may take her doggy always playing with her nipples. When she climaxes try to squeeze them softly. If this works out well you can raise the topic again and work towards nipple clamps.
In addition I made her masturbate. All the time working on her breast and when she climaxes she is not allowed to end masturbating until I tell her. This offers me plenty of time to work towards squeezing and pain play.
I would not do this everyday for the nipples to recover.
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