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    • #5552

      Basic | Dominant

      My love and I have just finished a play session. She lies sleeping alongside me as I type this. Tonight we departed from our normal D/s dynamic and play and ventured into the murky waters of humiliation.

      This came about as a result of an incident over the weekend. We had been lying in bed having an afternoon ‘nap’. The children were in the lounge room next door. My love whispered how horny she was. My riding her was out of the question (the bed needs repairs and currently squeaks). I directed my love to masturbate by rubbing herself against my thigh until she came. She came and the emotions that flooded through her surprised us both. Although I had not thought of it in that light, my love had felt like a rutting dog humping the leg of it’s owner, a humiliating experience. After talking over this she expressed a desire to explore degradation and humiliation within the bedroom. (Yes, I know, most aspects of BDSM can be viewed as having some form of humiliation associated with them, however my love and I determined that we would step it up a notch).

      My love did not go to work today and we discussed via text our feelings in relation to humiliation play. (I got almost no work done today at the office). The day progressed with me detailing various forms of humiliation and with my love repeatedly requesting to be allowed to orgasm. The requests were granted but as the day wore on I required what I considered to be somewhat humiliating acts – photos of digital anal penetration before permission was given to masturbate or photos of my love’s cum smeared face post orgasm. I also began calling her my little slut, rather than my love. Prior to leaving work for the day I gave her directions to remove all pubic, underarm and leg hair and to ensure her arsehole was clean. On getting home (after she greeted the kids) I required her to stand for inspection, naked but for a g string and tights down around her knees. I inspected her and then required her to bend over and spread her arse for me. There were some very fine blonde hairs around her arsehole. I took exception to these and then began pulling them out one by one as she stood bent over and spread while verbally chastising her for her lack of effort.

      Back out in the kitchen where my love had prepared a wonderful tea, I found excuses to find fault with her over various things, calling her slut whenever I spoke to her.

      Once children were in bed we retired to our room. I stripped my love but for the tights which I had cut a hole in over the crotch. I bound my loves arms behind her and then ring gagged her. My love does not usually find gags humiliating but I felt that being forced to drool onto the floor and into my hand, only to have me wipe my sodden hand over her face. I verbally chastised her, calling her my slut, abusing her for the drool she was leaving on the floor and generally doing my best to make it sound like she was a piece of meat for me to enjoy.

      I began to masturbate her with a wand before cuffing her hands to her ankles and tying her legs spread. Continuing to masturbate her I spat on her face, telling her that I would let her come provided she accepted my conditions… Naturally she gurgled in the affirmative.

      I had a butt plug with a suction cup which I placed on the floor and told her she would have to fuck it with her arse while masturbating if she wished to do so. Squatting, she began riding it while masturbating (the plug was unfortunately short and it was very awkward for my love. She persevered until I told her to get onto the bed where I then fucked her anally.

      When my love came I enjoyed the sound of her gargling…

      Aftercare was very different to our normal session where she sinks naked into an exhausted sleep in my arms. My love felt the need to shower (done together) and then put on a t shirt and briefs before cuddling in bed.

      We discussed the differences between our normal play and tonight’s. Almost everything I did to her (with the exception of spitting on her) would fit into our normal play, however, coupled with the build up and the verbal denigration I felt very much like I was playing a role. It was surprisingly exhausting. Our normal play leaves my love feeling very submissive and dependent on me, this play had not made her feel like that at all. And although my love liked me spitting on her in the abstract, it brought back a childhood memory of an incident involving macaroni and cheese and a vicious migraine – not quite what we were hoping for…

      All in all, considering that humiliation can be psychologically traumatic, we were happy with the result, although it will not feature on a regular basis in our play as it does not give to us as much as our other forms of play do.

      It was interesting that, unlike our normal play, this took more out of me than it did from my love, a result I hadn’t expected. It’s also a good example of not knowing if something works for you until you’ve tried it – some things, like the spitting seem like a good idea until you try them but can turn out to have unexpected associations.

      I hope you’ve found this interesting and possibly inspiring, motivating you to try things that you or your sub believe might add to your dynamic. If it does then great, if not, well you’ve tried it and now know.


    • #5556

      Basic | Dominant

      I think it should be possible to tell her how happy you feel that she is becoming more sexually active or focused. I don’t think that it is something that has to be done in a derogatory or degrading way – especially if that’s not part of Y/your personal dynamic.

      I would consider saying something along the lines of ‘my love, your sexual growth and desire fills me with joy. You gladden my heart with every orgasm’. These are my words, obviously and they fit with how I communicate with my love, which is a bit formal and florid – it works for us. I would suggest that you use your own words if this style doesn’t suit you.

      In addition not being a humiliating or degrading way to tell your wife, it also underlines that her development in this area brings you joy/happiness/satisfaction. This should encourage your wife further as she presumably wants to please you. It’s a win/win situation. She gets to orgasm knowing she is bringing you happiness at the same time.


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