Hello!

[wolfcub]

Nice to meet you mrspencer.

[Unknown Member]

MrSpencer40,

Welcome to husDom. When you say Master/slave, do you mean your sub has no input into your decision making, no way to enter feedback?

This might be a communication misunderstanding, but considering you have 2 years in I’m sure you are aware of the differences. I don’t believe any members at present are in an M/s.

Please read some of Mr. Fox’s early blogs, especially on downtime. If these are meaningful, then you might be in a D/s rather than an M/s.

Yours,

Boris.

[Unknown Member]

Boris,
During the last couple of “vanilla” years that we had I noticed changes in my wife that concerned me. She was not a threat to herself or others, there was no substance abuse, no infidelity; nothing like that. She just withdrew from activities that we normally enjoyed, became increasingly dependent on me for the simplest of things, became very quiet, and developed a short temper. Week after week I tried to get answers until she finally broke down one night. She told me of her submissiveness and her desire to serve. She explained that the world was too large for her and scared her to death. She explained that she did not want to ever have to make another decision and wanted a 1,2,3,4,5 step by step routine to follow every day. She told me of her yearning for punishment and reward. I was completely speechless. How could I have been so deeply involved with this person for so long and not have a clue? It took me a long time and a lot of serious thought before I even began reading and researching. After many weeks of study by both of us and hours and hours of conversation we began drawing up the paperwork. This took weeks as well. I believe that some of it was easier because we had already been together for so long while other aspects were very difficult. During all of these weeks it became glaringly obvious to me how badly she “needed” this.

So, long story short, no, she does not have any input into my decision making. We have had a “debriefing” of sorts once or twice at my request in order for her to express any concerns. Of course, with a child (14) in the house she still has to make a few basic everyday decisions. I suppose that pieces of the relationship do not fit some people’s definitions of M/s but it is certainly much more than D/s.

Thank you for the comment and question. It made me take another look at my situation. Please continue to give me your thoughts.

CS

[Unknown Member]

MrSpencer40,

My sub follows a schedule as well, and makes very few decisions, BUT we have regular and frequent debriefs, which we call “downtime” here on husDom. So, it sounds like you are a strict D/s rather than an M/s. The way I understand M/s is that after the initial consent, the slave has no other input and does whatever the Master wishes with no feedback. In extreme cases, there isn’t even a safeword, which to me is very bad.

The only reason I am asking you to clarify your meaning is that it may save you having to explain Master slave more than once.

Hope to see you in chat.

Yours,

Boris

[sidecuts-sir]

Hello anonymous, Sidecut and I have very similar story. She needs me to be very assertive and schedule to follow every step. I would say a more strict d/s. We have weekly communication and disciplines. Most of the time our communication time is cutt short by Sidecut, as she submits more. Sometimes She will act vanilla. Then I feel she needs some communication but it’s mostly she needs Sir to give her a reminder that she is under my decision. She does have choices and can talk about them with me during communication time.

[Unknown Member]

Welcome!